The Law as revealed to Saint Taznim

The Law as revealed to Saint Taznim is a holy Bovic scripture and fifth scroll of the Book of Doctrines.

The Law as revealed to Saint Taznim

And it came to pass that a lowly turtle farmer by the name of Taznim was herding her turtles across the great Klaasiyan plains, when suddenly a great voice spoke. Taznim was afraid for she knew not where the voice came from, and so she began to cower behind one of the larger turtles.

"Do not be afraid, my child, for I am the voice of the one true Cow. You have been chosen as you have forsaken all other cows before you and now are a shepherd of turtles, one of my noblest creations."

Taznim became less afraid and heard more clearly the voice now. It seemed to be coming from behind a large rock. "Do not come near the large rock, for you will be disappointed to learn that I am certainly not behind the rock, but my voice is emanating from the rock! Do not come to the rock or I will ... curse you and your children for seven and seventy generations!" Taznim was again afraid, but did not intend to have children, so she ventured closer to the rock.

"Fool! You have invoked the wrath of the Cow! I will now leave in disgust in the form of a cow made of butter to shame you and show my power!"

And with that the Butter Cow ran away from behind the rock.

Taznim saw that a stone tablet was left behind the rock and picked it up. On it were inscribed the Laws of the one true Cow. All who obeyed this law will find favor with the Cow and live with him in Dairyland for eternity.

Thou will not murder. Thou will not steal. Thou will not lie. Thou will not worship any other Cow. Thou will honor thy dairy farmers. Thou will embrace thy neighbor's strange customs. Thou will not covet thy neighbor's ass, thou will go to the gym instead.

And so, Taznim, having been shamed and cursed by the almighty Cow, was now the prophet of the Cow's law unto her people, the tribe of the Neemites. The Neemites will follow this law and become the chosen people of the Cow.

Preceded by: Revelations of Saint Biffor

Book of Doctrines 5

Succeeded by The Margarine Cow and the Grapefruit