Vices of Mount Vice

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Vices of Mount Vice is a holy Bovic scripture and third scroll of the Book of Doctrines.

The Story of the Vices of Mount Vice

As it came to pass, the Butter Cow and one of his nine disciples, Branflake, were walking along the road from Pavleton to Vice City.

When they came to the foothills of Mount Vice, Branflake lamented "One does not simply walk into Vice City."

To which the Butter Cow replied, "O ye fool! One simply climbs into Vice City, for it is built on the peak of Mount Vice, the tallest mountain in the land." And so they climbed.

When they came to the ancient, man-made plateau that Vice City was built on, they were shocked to see a menagerie of vice and sin.

Branflake lamented, "O Cow! Dost thou see the men laying with men as with women? And the all thou can eateth shrimp bar? And then the men laying with men as with women whilst eating all thou can eateth shrimp?"

And the reverent Butter Cow gazed upon the abominations and vices. Soon he turned to Branflake and spake thusly, "Well that... that's just fine."

And Branflake was left on the street to view the abominations as the reverent Butter Cow walked into the nearest all thou can eateth lobster bar, for he had his own butter for dressing it in.


Preceded by:
The False Cow
Book of Doctrines
3
Succeeded by
Revelations of Saint Biffor