The Rhode Book of Micronationalism

Scott of Hyperborea · Wed Jun 02, 2004 10:18 pm

I was browsing the Atteran archives and came across this. By Jason Rhode, about 2002, but still surprisingly relevant today. 
 
THE RHODE BOOK OF MICRONATIONALISM 
1.All generalizations are false, including this one. 
2. Action, Action, Action. 
3. Trust only movement. 
4. Misdirection is god of all things, mostly of the hidden ones. 
5. Micronationalism incorporates many tenets of religion, most notably the Christian resurrection: no micronationalist is ever dead for long. 
6. Never forget that in the world of micronations, absolute tyranny is neither. 
7. Machiavelli says it's best to be both the lion and the fox. Every lion in this game is trying to be a fox, and failing. Every fox is a fox because they're not popular enough to be a lion. Try and be both. 
8. The Apollo people are good primarily at two things: sticking together when they don't need to, and fighting when unity is called for. Hence, their survival. 
9. There are two sins in micronationalism, and two sins alone: being too boring, and being too dangerous. Both will cost you. 
10. Machiavellia is the only nation with enough honesty to put its name on the dagger. 
11. You can never post too much, except in Lyrica. 
12. There are two kinds of government - open conspiracy and closed conspiracy. Be open. It will gratify your allies, and astonish everyone else. 
13. Always, always, always, make sure you know who your friends are. 
14. The Deng Xiaoping Principle of Pragmatism: Black cat, white cat. All that matters is that it catches mice. 
15. The best place to hide secrets is right under their nose. 
16. The threat of military power is always more powerful than military power. 
17. Always choose the battlefield. 
18. Power doesn't corrupt men; it ripens them. 
19. Where Diga goes, the rest shall follow. 
20. The Yuri Principle: Mosquitoes are swatted because they have too much power for their size, and thus are problematic, but easily dealt with. Be like the elephant - massive body, strength used only when needed. 
21. Nobody has a body here. The reputation, friendships dignity, and sanity of your foes are the only things you can destroy. And they're the ones that hurt the most. 
22. Atterans hold the secret to pragmatism; be forgiving of your enemies (as it's wiser not to hold grudges), but never forget their names. 
23. Knowing how to roar is nice. Knowing how to type is better. And knowing how to spell is best of all. 
24. The Tony Au Factor: About the quiet ones. Half of them know nothing, and the other half know everything there is to know. Find out which is which, and listen to the latter. The other half, you can put in your army. 
25. Attack the door. If the door is closed, go through the window, if the window is closed, go down the chimney, if the chimney is closed go through the pipes, the back gate, from the basement, the attic, just go, go, go. 
26. Try not to kill with your own knife. Borrow somebody else's. 
27. Yes, we play others, and we're all being played by somebody else. 
28. Entropy is the ultimate foe, but she can be mastered. Turn her loose on your enemies instead. 
29. The Conway Rule: The armies of the entire world against a fast pen: almost an even match. Too bad for the soldiers, though. 
30. Culture is great for a society and makes life inside the micro-state livable. But how many divisions did Tapfer have? 
31. Boil the waters to make the fish hop out. 
32. Intermicronational Assemblies: In the world where talk and action have nothing in common, these places are the capitals. Those seeking shelter from reality would do well here. But, then again, this is the best garden to grow influence in. It is a herb that does poorly in isolated patches. And if you want to plant weeds, do it here too. 
33. - Perception is Power, and Power Belongs to Those That Post. - 
34. Only chameleons can climb the heights of Olympus. 
35. The image you post with actually matters. 
36. Everywhere else, madness is a retreat. In Shireroth, it's an advance. 
37. The Great Old micronations exist as debating societies, in where there is neither debate, nor society. The aspiration of every citizen? 
38. In micronational monarchies, the successor is always the best friend, or, interestingly, the worst enemy. 
39. The Law of Collapsing New States: Hard ideology and neo-nations are directly proportional to failures and mergers in the micronational community; when one goes up, the other is sure to follow. 
40. What is a micronation? It's a fantasy blown up by necessary bureaucracy. 
41. The 110%: The number of offices in any country grows in proportion to the number of citizens, but will always stay at that ratio: there will be more desks than people. 
42. The Flying Islands have taught us one thing: what goes up, must come down. 
43. The Maxim of Four: The government of a micronation really needs only four officers: someone to lecture, someone to listen, someone to march, and someone to look everywhere else. Erik Metzler is a fortunate man; he does all of them himself. 
44. Nations feed off of two nutritional groups: ego, and text. 
45. The micronational state: In every case, a perfect system ruined by people. 
46. Aristotle said that He who is unable to live in society, or who has no need because he is sufficient for himself, must be either a beast or a god. Or, in the case of micronations, both. 
47. Finally: Try and remember, it's only a game